I remember thinking to myself over a second glass of Pinot eight months ago” This wasn’t the plan, it wasn’t meant to happen this way, I don’t deserve this struggle” and it’s taken this long for me to shift this paradigm to “This was the plan on some level, it meant to happen and I choose not to accept that single parenthood is a life full of struggles but instead a journey for the strong”.
I decided to start a business, what, I didn’t know, but as time went on and I observed chat rooms for single parents and read articles published by various people on statistics and came to see how little really was given in government allowance I saw a common problem many single parents faced. The cost of daycare and cost of rent and expenses took away more than half their pay checks or allowances. They were all struggling. I was struggling. I didn’t like it. I felt like everyone was in a constant battle of making ends meet and the ripple effect of stress and emotional deflation, let alone dint in the self-confidence of these care givers really got me thinking.
I read this quote by William Wordsworth a few week ago, “To begin, begin” – I took it to heart and started a business for single parents to help with rental and everyday expenses, child mining/babysitting and emotional mentorship and creating opportunities for more social engagement.
Building the business is a passion of mine because it is going to change the support system for them and show that they really need to create a village for their tribe and not do it alone. It’s a hard slog. I am up later than my children, I am awake earlier than them. I heard that parenthood was exhausting but I feel like a walking zombie sometimes. However, I not only do this for myself or other single parents but in order to create a better future for my children and become a role model they can look up too.
Starting and running your own business is no piece of cake. Neither is raising a family and doing it alone is no cherry on top but I am doing it as a daily goal. A little bit each day and a bit slower than those without children or with a partner but I am lapping those on the couch, no matter how slow I am growing. With a little bit of a mix of intelligence, creativity and sheer determination and patience I will make my business a success whilst still sweeping, cooking dinners, making lunches, walking dogs, working out, being a taxi, cuddling, reading books, playing and being the wearer of so many more hats and I will be doing it knowing that I don’t have anyone to answer to except myself and my kids and I am living this life on my terms and with my business inspired by my children and my “relationship status”, it’s for sure …. Meant to be this way.
Wilhelmina Ford, 37 years old.
Single mother of a 3 year old boy, 10 month old daughter and 12 year old kelpie.
Founder of Parenting Reimagined, ShareAbode and ShareSit.